I live in Texas. Seasonally thawing out is something that we rarely experience here. We do have cold weather, but snow and ice are not typical here on the Gulf Coast. School is over, baseball is in full swing, the pool is open, and the summer solstice is around the corner. The world around me is starting to heat up and bloom, and I’m still trying to thaw out.

My physical thermostat is not broken. I’m personally not experiencing the crisis the character Elsa faced in the movie “Frozen.” I am trying to come back from a very numbing time in my life. I can share my laundry list of taxing times and struggles if it would help paint the picture and give a point of reference to anyone reading this. But when I do this I feel guilty because I know there are always going to be individuals and families out there that are in situations that are much more grave than my own. I should suck it up, be strong and work harder.

Guess what? This behavior isn’t working too well for me. It is crippling me emotionally and physically. I am trying to find ways to thaw out a little at a time. I want to avoid glacial calving and causing dangerous waves that would impact those around me in a negative way.

One of the ways I’m working through this is writing this blog. It is forcing me to take some time away from caregiving and focus on my thoughts. I’d like to add yoga to support and activate my healing, but I’m not up to facing a bunch of young Lululemon-wearing millennials in a yoga class just yet.

I’m also studying my vision board. My most recent board was created about three and a half years ago after my tenth wedding anniversary. I love this particular board. It is full of travel, adventure, family, and a sense of whole self. When I first created this board it all felt so far away. It still seems hazy, but now I feel that if I look hard enough and open myself up the pieces will start to fall into place and more of what I see will materialize in my life.

I also recognize that I have to open myself up emotionally so that I can embrace new ideas and opportunities that are coming my way. I think they also call that “allowing yourself to be vulnerable.” I feel pretty vulnerable writing these words and sending them out into the world. When I feel this way, I often turn to prayer.

Dear Lord. Please give me courage. Allow me to acknowledge my gifts and feel my worth. Shine your favor upon my family and know we are forever grateful for your blessings. Amen.